i wake up and meghan is making breakfast, gillette's gone to get milk and eggs. we eat, i say goodbyes, drive home. pack up stuff, leave, intending to go to granddaddy's, stop by darlene's on the way. get to darlene
s, talk to her. start toward capron, realize have forgotten my laptop, must go back. go back, get laptop, drive richmond, have no money so can't buy anything. dont know her friends, cant read her foreigness, want to crawl away. want to be home.

why are you so disappointing? i have ideas and desires and i'm getting ready to start becoming in a different way. and you turn away.